Please bend over for some hot wheel finger tricks

It’s been awhile since I’ve looked up the search terms that lead people to this quiet little corner of the blogosphere, and just like always, I was amused, confused and downright horrified when I checked out the stats tonight.  I thought I’d share the joy, and I’ve even broken them up into categories.  Seriously…I could not make this stuff up.

First on the list, the I-can’t-believe-anyone-reads-the-crap-from-those-wankers-at-Savage-Henry-anyway category:

rape jokes

sick rape jokes

disgusting rape joke

how much xanax to rape girlfriend

Thanks, guys.

The ubiquitous Xanax Connection:

xanax sugarcubes

can you bake xanax

if I take xanax can I still join the air force

how much xanax can go in sugar before you can  taste it

how to snort xanax

Of course there’s the – Adults Only Search Terms:

spanking bench

vaginal sizeshow

oops voyeur pics

is butter good for masturbating

bend over

anal vacation

bollywood hairy armpits

nuns panties stillettos

gay guys covered in chocolate

deep fried chocolate covered orgasm

Yum.

And last but not least, the category that can only be described as – WTF?:

very big feet with ugly toes

hot wheel finger tricks

patted my mom’s butt

mumbling in Walmart

who is the lysol mopping man

crazies on the loose

Okay, I kind of understand that last one.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this little journey through the minds of mad googlers as much as I have.  See you all next time – I’m off to enjoy my anal vacation.



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19 responses to “Please bend over for some hot wheel finger tricks

    • Am I the only one who noticed a deafening silence on this topic?

      Well, I was doing some important hands-off research in hopes of bringing some experienced perspectives to the blog, so I searched under songs with butter in the title when I found this English song… (being puritanical by nature, I asked permission to post):

      Betty Botter Bought some Butter

      Betty Botter bought bum butter
      blah, said she, bum butters bitter.
      but its blended in my batter
      and its made my batter bitter.
      If I blend some better butter
      better than the bitter butter
      it will make my bitter batter better.
      Betty Botter blended better butter
      better than the bitter butter
      put it in the bitter batter
      now the bitter batters better.

        • You astutely ascertained that this was not a definitive answer to Jen’s question… so I kept on searching—
          ha– in the second season of Petticoat Junction there was an episode titled “Kate’s Bachelor Butter”— I can’t seem to find it on utube… but I feel confident the answer to the question may be found there.

  1. I want very badly to comment but hardly know what to say…
    These kind of analytics alone seem like reason enough to migrate one’s blog to WordPress

  2. I have a blog where I also do a regular search of keywords that bring people to it. (I’m also in Humboldt, but my blog isn’t always Humboldt-centric.) Anyway, I’m a frequently disturbed by what brings people to me. Granted, I write some off-the-wall things sometimes, but nowhere even close to what people are looking for. Publishing the keyword searches has become a favorite of readers. Glad to see you are doing the same. The world is full of some sick people.

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